Wednesday, September 16, 2009

I can be a SLOW learner.

It's true, but oh, how I wish it weren't: I'm thick headed at times. I had an older and a younger brother--yep the tomboy right in the middle. And I've been informed over more than one holiday meal that I am indeed stubborn. Always thought of it as one of my better attributes. (Mind you it has indeed served me well in certain situations but for the purposes of this discussion I'll set those aside.) It has also meant that God has had to drag me kicking and screaming, arms crossed with lips tightly pursed through many a scenario over and over again! Like the lightning bolt that finally got through my, yes, thick head this morning.

Did you realize that when you husband asks you to do something that gets you outside and makes you sweat, that it made actually be the same as you asking him to "be more romantic would you already"? Don't rush past that. Read it again. OK , now let's think about it.

Romance to him IS "playing" together. Huh? They left that out of my fairy tales growing up!! He was suppose to sweep ME off MY feet, tend to My romantic notions--candle lights, rose pedals, jewelery--surely his mother told him?!? I bet my husband has asked me to ride a bike or jog or go outside join him more times than I can count. I have always considered it a nuisance. But was I actually turning down a sincere need of his? OUCH. He said I was, my stubborn self said, no-that's not what I was told, that's not how I feel, so-No.

Know what else? I would have told you I was meeting his needs. And I was. Cooking, cleaning, caring for the kids----but, and here's the kicker, was I caring for the needs he cared about most or that I cared about most? That's a question I will have to print on a card and put in my Bible and ask myself daily because I think it's one I need to pray over (and over and over and over).

So will I remember what God has finally gotten me to recognize this morning? I am praying that the same stubbornness that would not allow me to accept something as truth because I couldn't see it that way will now allow me to hang on to it for all I'm worth. That way the LORD can use it to grow me into a wiser woman, one who can be a better wife and mother--His way!

Hosea 4:16 (New Century Version)
16 The people of Israel are stubborn like a stubborn young cow. Now the Lord will feed them like lambs in the open country.

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